At the end of the day....

If you are like me then you are probably  getting very tired of all of the mommy wars out there. Cry it out. Don't cry it out. Stroller vs baby wearing.  Tv or no tv. Homeschool or public school. Vaccinate or don't.  3 kids are harder than 2. Older kids are harder than younger. Last but not least stay at home mom vs working mom. You get the idea. Well my thought on this is at the end of the day can't we all just support each other? Parenting is hard. No matter what situation. Encourage each other. Love each other  and say, "Hey we can do this. God is on our side. You're doing a beautiful job Mommy, keep it up!" To the stay at home mom of young kids I understand the struggles of feeling like you are busy all day but nothing gets done. The constant struggle of do I get the housework done or do I say forget it and just sit down and spend some quality time with the kids when the time presents itself. Stay encouraged because those littles won't remember these  stay in your pajamas, seeing laundry piled up (clean piles and dirty piles because let's be real...who has time to always get it put away?) toys scattered everywhere, non gourmet meal days. They will remember that you love them and did everything you knew to do to help them grow. That they are getting your best which in my opinion is pretty darn great. And remember your home never gets a break. There is usually someone there 24 hours a day to mess it up so don't stress over always having a flawless, perfectly clean home. Enjoy your kids. They are only kids for a season. I understand that longing of wanting to sit down for a whole 5 minutes in a row to just gather your thoughts. I  understand that feeling of being overwhelmed because you don't get much adult conversation and then you drown your husband with conversation when he gets home from work because you just need someone to talk to. I understand your sacrifice. You mom are rockin' it!  And don't let anyone tell you that you aren't working hard. Or tell you that you are just a stay at home mom. You lady are so much more than that. To the working moms. I know it is hard to say goodbye to your children to go to work. I know there are moments when you wish you could just stay at home and fix meals, pick up toys, break up sibling fights, change diapers....because at least then you would be with your children. I also know that you are doing what you feel is best for your family. Whether you choose to work or need to work as long as your kids are happy and well loved then don't let anyone put you down for doing your best. I see that balancing a career and parenthood is a job in itself. I understand that some of you feel like getting out of the house and going to work helps make you a more patient mom because let's face it...sometimes we just need time away from the kids. I get that.  And that just because you need that time away doesn't mean you don't love your kids,  it means you know yourself and that you know what situation is best to help you be the best mom you can be. To the moms that need to work, I see the pain when you have to drop your kids off at daycare so you can earn that much needed paycheck. I see the struggles of just wanting 1 day off to be at home and watch your kids grow. Working moms I see the heartache that comes with missing out on important milestones. I know working away from home is hard. I understand that by working you are teaching your kids the importance of a great work ethic. And that working hard for your family is an honorable thing. I also understand  those moments when you get home from work, you just want to sit down for 5 minutes to unwind but instead you realize in that very moment you are needed. You don't complain. You cherish those moments with your kids. Because you know in return you are getting happy children that love that special mommy time.  And because you work, it may be 24 hours before you get another one of those moments. You working moms are doing a fantastic job!!Stay encouraged! And to both stay at home moms and working moms I ask you to remember that neither are easy. Both require sacrifice. Both are 24 hour jobs with no breaks. Both are respectable and deserve praise for doing a great job. Keep it up moms and know that your children appreciate you. And when they look at you they see a humble self-less person just trying to be the best mom they can be, setting good examples for them. And when other moms look at you they see themselves in you. That deep down they know that some days you are just trying to survive. And no two days are the same. Some are easy and some are so hard you find yourself crying at random times of the day.  And when your husband looks at you he sees a strong woman who is capable of doing anything. When your family sees you they are looking at a woman that loves her family more than herself. And when God sees you,  I think he is saying "Well done. You are giving it your all and doing an amazingly awesome job. And on those days when it is just really hard and you are crying out to me for help just to get through the day, remember I am right here with you. We are doing this together, I got your back. I never left you. I hear your prayers. I may not answer the way you want but I do hear you and I am answering the way that I know is best for you. I am using these hard moments to teach you and to help you grow in certain areas of your life. I love you and will never leave your side."


And to all moms, keep in mind when you see that mom who is letting their child cry it out. Maybe they have had months of sleepless nights and feel like they can't go one night more without rest. Maybe they wish their baby was easily comforted and that co sleeping was an option. Maybe they just have a fussy baby and nothing they do seems to help so they have to use this as a last resort. Let them know that everything will be ok. Don't judge them. Help them. And encourage them. They aren't doing it because they are mean, heartless parents. They are doing it because they know that is the only way for anyone to get rest and that without that rest they are just  grumpy mommy zombies who can't seem to enjoy life because their brains have turned to mush from lack of sleep. Trust me. I know this feeling all too well.

When you see a homeschooling mom remember that they aren't doing it because they think they are too good for public school. Or that they are better than you. They are simply doing it because they know that is what fits their family's needs the most. Funny thing is I can say the exact same thing about public school moms. They know what is best for their family and public school is just a better fit. No rights or wrongs here. Just parents wanting the best for their kids.

I think you get the idea of this post without me having to go into detail about every mommy war that has ever surfaced.  At the end of the day, love each other. Pat each other on the back. Encourage each other. Listen to each other's struggles. Praise each other's efforts. Survive this thing called being a mom together. Stop pointing fingers and start reaching out a helping hand. I will add that this can also apply to dads. I am in no way purposely leaving them out. Dads are pretty awesome too! They deserve that encouragement and pat on the back as well. I am just writing this from the view of a mommy just trying to give it my all and encourage others along the way. This is not meant to offend anyone so my apologies if it does. I am just hoping that all moms can find encouragement through each other. I know I can't possibly mention the struggles of all moms. But I know one thing I can say for certain, the joys of being a mom far outweigh the struggles. Every hard second or minute or hour or day is worth it when you see those smiles, get those hugs, and hear those giggles. Our kids love us and nothing can beat that feeling.